


Lost Love and Old Friend

by MeredithBrody



Category: Star Trek Destiny, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Star Trek: Enterprise
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-06
Updated: 2012-11-21
Packaged: 2017-11-18 02:19:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/555800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MeredithBrody/pseuds/MeredithBrody
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Before their raid on the Borg ship, Ezri Dax checks on Erika Hernandez to find out how the displaced Captain is coping with her new reality. The two begin to talk of lost loves and old friends, the emotions pushing them to a place they never planned on going.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Jekkah](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jekkah/gifts).



The stillness of the room was still pressing on Erika. It didn't seem like days had passed since she had transferred to the _Aventine_ from _Titan_. The first day here, she had been handed the final words her long lost love had said about her. She had since discovered he had never married, never been involved with anyone as far as the historical documents could tell. Until his death, Jonathan had maintained that something unusual had happened to _Columbia_. At the end of the war he had taken _Enterprise_ to search for them. She wasn't sure if they fact they had seen _Columbia_ on their sensors, and written them off as a pre-warp ship made her feel better or worse. Knowing that Jonathan had been so close to finding her, to finding them, just to know that he had been shouted down by someone, the brass maybe, or his science officer. She was still mulling it over when the chime for her door sounded, Erika's head snapped up and she tried her best to put on a smile, not really sure if she was ready to talk about anything, especially not to these people she barely knew.

Erika's smile became slightly warmer at the appearance of Captain Dax, she wan't sure what it was about the youthful Captain, but something about her spoke to Erika in a way she hadn't experienced in almost 800 years. Dax's steps were light as she came across the room, not showing any of the hesitance that had characterised Riker's visits to her when she had been housed on _Titan_.

"Are you ready for tomorrow?" Dax asked, sitting beside her, looking at the picture that Erika had pulled up on a padd and had been looking at. One of her and Jonathan at a briefing for the war, almost 230 years ago, in this timeline, though to Erika it felt so much longer. "To do what we planned?"

"Are any of us ever ready, Captain?" She asked, a small sigh escaping her lips even as she did, she remembered the numerous conversations she had had over the years where she had been asked if she was ready. Almost every time the answer had been a resounding 'no', but that was never the answer that she gave, instead she would smile and say 'yes'. She was wise enough now to know that she was never going to be ready for everything, and it was naive for her to pretend that she was.

Dax's eyes skimmed her face before she replied to the question Erika had posed, Dax again spoke with a wisdom that didn't seem to fit with her age, a patience and calmness that Erika hadn't expected. "We can be ready for the unexpected, surely, and please, call me Ezri."

"Ezri, I hope this won't seem a rude question, but how old are you?" Erika looked away from the still for the first time and actually studied the woman beside her. She had already studied the Trill species in the database she had been given access too, unsurprisingly her access codes didn't recognise her clearance, so everything she was reading was declassified, but she had learnt enough to know that, much like her, you couldn't judge Ezri's age by her looks.

"The host, Ezri, is 27, but Dax, the symbiont, is over 300." Ezri paused and smiled, "By the same token, how many years do you have, I know that by chronological age, you would be 256 at your last birthday, but I feel you may have lived far longer than that"

"I guess I'd be around" Erika paused, having to think for a moment, having known that Axion had been thrown to the mid-1500s in the cataclysm, she decided on a year, and figured that by that point, the exact year wouldn't matter. "I think around 943 Earth years. Not that I feel them. Sometimes I feel like a day hasn't passed since I was working on the NX-programme, or fighting the Romulans' alongside-" Her voice caught in her throat as she thought about him, looking at the picture again. "-Jonathan." she finished far quieter, and picked up the still, flicking to the next one, another photo of the two of them, this time from some function, they were both in dress uniforms, still standing too close to one another. She smiled sadly at the memory, and the knowledge that this man was just history to the people on this ship, but to her, he was so much more.

"You miss him still?" Ezri asked, a slight note of surprise in her voice, and Erika just looked at her, unsure really what to say, of course she still missed him. "He was vocal about Columbia. There was a lot of speculation at the time about your relationship." Ezri trailed off, realising that clearly the speculation of the time had been on the money. Ezri slipped her hand into Erika's and forced her to put the padd down. "How long were you two together?"

"On and off for," Erika thought, the years felt like they had all blurred into one, from their first meeting when she was just 24, to their relationship in their late 20's and early 30's, to his promotion, and then their rekindled romance before her disappearance. "Wow, more than 15 years. I was 24 when we met, and 41 when _Columbia_ was attacked." She stopped talking, having not thought about her and Jonathan's relationship in many years, but she knew with Ezri she could be honest about her feelings. "In every lifetime there is that special friend you make. They go beyond the soulmate that is so talked about, in Human culture at least. They not only match your soul, but your mind and your heart too. They are the person you can turn to regardless of the situation, and know that they will always do what's best for you, even if that is the most painful thing that they could do at the time." Erika's mind travelled over all the advice he had given her, all the hours they had spent together, talking about things that weren't necessarily going to change the universe, but that were important at the time. He had always given her advice that had helped, even in the midst of his post-Xindi depression. He had been that special person to her, and nobody in 800 years had come close to equalling that. "Jonathan Archer was that friend to me. That man. I loved him, more than anything. I still do. Even after all this time."

"Those kind of friendships, those kind of relationships are rare, but so powerful, and it's rare that we appreciate them." Ezri paused, and looked down at their still intertwined hands, Erika followed her gaze and squeezed the Trill's hands, surprised by how cold they felt against hers. Ezri brought herself back to the moment, and Erika wondered whether Ezri had been thinking about a friend or a lover. "We don't appreciate them until we lose them. I lost Benjamin, who was my best friend through 3 lifetimes, and although he returned, he had changed to the point where I no longer recognised him. I still wonder, sometimes, what my Benjamin would say to me in any given situation."

"I blame myself, for the Romulan attack, for everything that happened after that. I even blamed myself for my crew staging a mutiny. I still do blame myself. But I also know that there was a reason for it, maybe the reason was for me to be here, with you." Erika felt the subtle change in the air in the room, and wondered if she was as red as she suddenly felt she was. Her eyes settled once again and their hands, and she wondered if maybe this was the time she should move away. Something kept her glued to the spot though. She looked sideways to see the tears also forming in Ezri's eyes, the thoughts of the past affecting them both. Erika freed one of her hands so she could wipe Ezri's face. The two women shared a genuine smile, the first smile Erika had truly meant in as long as she could remember.

"I'm certainly glad you're here." Ezri almost whispered, the look and the moment both lingering longer than either had intended. Erika wasn't sure exactly what was happening, but she knew they both needed the comfort the other was offering, but the time and place wasn't now, or was it? She didn't know any more, and as they moved ever so slightly toward each other, the door chime sounded again. Erika jumped backward, feeling like a teenager who had been caught in the back seat of a car. The two women both looked to the door as their fellow Captain's walked through the door, Erika smiled again in Ezri's direction while motioning for the two men to take seats. The emotions of the night may have been at least partly to blame for the attraction she held to Ezri, or maybe it was just two old souls finding each other, and trying to make the best of a bad situation. Either way, she was certain that her conversations with Ezri would all be as eventful. Or she hoped so at least. It had been a very long time.


	2. Chapter 2

After Riker and Picard left, she found herself staring again at Ezri. They had sat too close during the meeting, she knew she could blame the small couch, or the fact they were sharing a padd, but she wondered if it had been as blatant as it felt. Though the minute the two men left the emotions in the room raised again. Erika wasn't sure if it was the conversation they'd had, the first time she had spoken candidly about Jonathan in a very long time, or if the air was filled with something more.

Ezri smiled, and walked toward the door, Erika reached out and grabbed her arm, stopping her in her tracks. They were similarly matched, and the deepness of Ezri's eyes showed the centuries of experience that the Trill woman had contained within her. Erika stroked the hair out of her counterparts eyes, and the longer her hand lingered the greater her desire to act. Ezri leant slightly into Erika's hand, and that was the moment she made the decision.

She leant forward slowly and kissed Ezri, softly at first until Ezri moved into it, the younger woman's arms coming around Erika's neck, and tangling in her long hair. The two women moving in a tight embrace that neither would have expected to feel so familiar, and so comforting. Erika pulled back a little a few seconds later, searching Ezri's face for her reactions.

As she pulled away she heard a miniscule groan from the other woman. Ezri smiled back at Erika for a second and then pulled her in for another kiss, far harder, far deeper than the previous one. Erika's hand sought for the zip in Ezri's uniform. She didn't want to break the embrace for even a second to look for what she was searching for. The zip seemed to run away from her, never being exactly where she wanted it to be. Eventually she pushed the jacket down as Ezri managed to mirror the action.

Suddenly Erika found herself cursing the layers that Starfleet seemed to have built into their uniforms since her time, her impatient growl causing Ezri to chuckle against her lips, as she started pulling Ezri's undershirt out of her waistband she felt herself being moved in the direction of the bed, slow backward steps across the room, her hands snaking across Ezri's stomach as they did. They shared another smile as Ezri pulled Erika's undershirt over her head, then threw her own across the room.

It seemed like hours later they fell to the bed, Erika pulled at Ezri's trousers, once finding her fingers slower than her mind, all of her senses seemed to be going a thousand miles an hour as they last remaining articles of their clothing hit the floor. She ran her hands up Ezri's torso, slowly circling her breast, smiling as she watched her fellow captains eyes darken at the simple touch. She grinned as she slowly licked her lips before taking one of Ezri's hardened peaks into her mouth, using her other hand to tease her opposite. She bit down gently, bringing a pained moan from Ezri, whose hand tangled itself in Erika's hair, holding her in position.

She bit her lip a little as Ezri squirmed under Erika's hand as she ran her fingers along Ezri's slit. She was surprised that Ezri was as ready as she was. Erika moved up a little and kissed Ezri as hard as she could as her finger found her sensitive little nib. The noise Ezri made against her mouth made her smile into the kiss and just press a little harder. Ezri moved a hand to the middle of Erika's back and dug her nails in while the other hand gripped the sheets. She pulled back just a little and watched Ezri's expression as she dipped a finger inside. Ezri's determined eyes met Erika's, the bright blue that surrounded the deep irises reminded Erika of the sea.

Ezri's moans grew, and Erika could feel how ready she was for the release that was coming. She just kept watching, Ezri's face getting flushed has she let out a yelp, biting her lip as her inner walls clenched around Erika's fingers. Erika helped her down from her climax, and smiled as Ezri took control of the encounter, and Erika was willing to let her. The Trill smiled down as she leaned over Erika, pushing her back against the bed. Running her fingers down Erika's sides. Then up her stomach, settling around her breasts.

Unlike Erika, who herself had been hesitant at first, Ezri knew exactly what she wanted to do. She kissed Erika, and slowly licked down her chest, her fingers sliding over Erika's breasts, then she continued down, licking around her belly button, eliciting a light giggle from Erika, she'd always been just a little ticklish, and it was something that many past lovers had used against her. Ezri's blue eye's glinted with a mischievous grin and Erika could tell she hadn't missed that fact.

Seconds later Erika forgot everything, she made a keening sound as Ezri's tongue suddenly hit her spot, the nerves all ready for the moment. Ezri nibbled lightly on her clit before taking a long lick along her slit. Erika's groans were the only sound in the room as Ezri expertly made her squirm under her ministrations. Not one part of her felt like she was being ignored. Her body crying for Ezri to let her out, and she did. Ezri moved to kiss her and muffle her groans as she came, and her body shuddered to a close. Afterwards, Ezri wrapped her arms around her, the two of them both catching their breath. Ezri sat up and smiled,

"Well that was unexpected" She said, her smile showing that she didn't regret it, and maybe it had been unexpected, but Erika had enjoyed herself in an activity she hadn't done in the longest time. She nodded to Ezri and almost burst out laughing,

"Yeah, sorry about that." She joked, catching the shirt Ezri threw in her direction and trying to pull it on backwards. Instead she stopped and just watched as Ezri gathered her clothes. "I really am sorry if-"

"Don't be," Ezri held a hand up and stopped her with another smile "I know I don't need to tell you that the centre seat is a lonely place." Erika just nodded, remembering how alone she'd been when she couldn't call Jonathan for his advice and she was almost certain that Ezri was the same. "This was exactly what I needed."

"I'm glad I could help." Erika said, completely honestly, and then she looked at the computer, which still had the menacing image of a Borg cube spinning on it. "I should probably get back to preparing."

"Be careful, right?" Ezri said, her voice tight as she straightened her uniform and checked it in the mirror, before pausing at the door.

"I will." Erika confirmed. Still sat on the bed. Once Ezri had left she opened the picture of Jonathan and thought of him, apparently she had a think for sleeping with captains who needed to be saved from themselves. She hoped that Jonathan would keep an eye on her while she did what she needed to on the Borg ship. She'd need him to be there, even if it was only in her mind. She wouldn't be able to do it alone, even with the help of Ezri, it was such a gigantic mission.

Though all of her nerves had disappeared, and she doubted she'd ever be able to thank Ezri enough for that. Nerves had always been her biggest enemy. Tomorrow the dawn would come, and she'd be on the front line of yet another war, this time a war that she wasn't remotely prepared for, but that she knew she could play an integral part in. When Earth had needed her, she had been on the sidelines because of an attack, but that had lead her here, and now Earth and its allies needed her. It was her time to matter. It was her time to matter, and to change history, in a positive way, and in a way that would have made Jonathan proud.


End file.
